Love you fillah

Betullah ukhwah itu indah bila dua dua hati link kat Allah.

tak pernah jumpa tapi rasa rapat sangat..see indahnya ukhwah kerana Allah..

ini yg aku rase dgn dua org sahabat yg aku tak pernah jumpa..sekadar di online share tentang Islam..

Cinta Allah . Allah sampaikan cinta kita kepada dia. tak perlu bercinta secara haram..pilih cinta syurga atau cinta neraka..

Biar aku dipanggil ortodoks biar aku digelar kolot..tak pe..kerana aku kejarkan cinta syurga bukan cinta neraka..

'kamu' bersama sama kita cinta Allah lebih drp segalanya tau.. cinta Allah..Allah sampaikan cinta kita..

i love you fillah...

Perutusan 2013..

2012.

For all pain i have been through. For all the happiness i have been gifted. Thank you Allah for all these memories and bless.

2012 has taught me a lot and totally have changed my life. TOTALLY. I learn to be a better Mukminah..

and for every single person who i have met and made my year amazingly wonderful! I love you all Lillahita'ala.

'Kamu'. I'm standing still waiting for you here. Aku tahu 'kamu' juga sedang mencari redhaNya..teruskan..cintailah DIA lebih daripada segalanya..Allah maha tahu bila waktu tebaik untuk kita bertemu..Waktu kita telah mencintai Allah melebihi segalanya..

To all family and friends..

May 2013 brings us close to Allah. Makes us a better ummah and get us being showed with barakah from HIM, the One and Only Almighty. Allahuakbar!

Mataku dah lain, telingaku dah lain, mulutku dah lain..

Dulu aku tak seperti mana aku hari ini...

Dulu i see everything in this world differently...


Dulu aku tak peduli aurat ku... aku tak kisah solat ku...dulu aku tak jaga pergaulanku.. hatiku hanya untuk dunia...


Dulu... itu dulu...


Setelah makcik hidayah datang mengetuk hatiku... yg bila dia datang aku pon tak pasti... 

aku bersyukur kerana Allah memilih hatiku ... 

Allah berfirman :

"Sesungguhnya kamu tidak akan dapat memberi petunjuk kepada orang yang kamu cintai, tetapi Allah menunjuki orang yang dikehendaki-Nya dan Allah mengetahui orang-orang yang menerima petunjuk" (Q.S. 28 :AlQashash :56)


Sesungguhnya Hidayah itu milik Allah. Berdoalah kita agar mendapat hidayah daripada Allah...

Alhamdulillah... 

Doa ku semoga hati ini terus beristiqamah mencari keredhaan Allah...Cukup sekali berada di zaman jahiliyah... orang mukmin yang berjaya tidak akan jatuh ke dalam lubang yang sama dua kali...

Ayuh bangun sahabat.. mari kita mencari cinta yang hakiki... cinta Allah...

Rasakan kemanisan iman...Indah nya terasa bila hati sentiasa bersama Allah...satu perbezaan yang paling nyata.. dulu tiap kali bangun tido aku mesti rasa serabut tapi sekarang aku rasa sangat tenang... alhamdulillah...

Apa azam tahun baru? tiada lain selain ingin mendekatkan diri kepada Allah.InsyaAllah.

Semoga Allah memudahkan urusanku untuk terus beristiqamah....

25 Rules of being close to Allah SWT =)

1.  Start off each day with 'adhkaar al-istiyqaadh' (waking up Supplications), thanking Allah for waking up in good shape.

 2.  Put Allah first in your life.

 3.  Broaden your horizons - learn 5 new verses from the Quran every day, travel to pray far in the mosque to brighten your day,take up a booklet having supplications and read them.

 4.  Pray Salaat Al-dhuhaa (after sunrise).

 5.  If someone says something mean; to you, just shrug it off and dismiss it in a friendly, laidback manner, and pray that Allah shall forgive them.

 6.  When you get angry, remember Allah, and how short and worthless life is to waste in being Angry.

 7.  Remember that you can never have too many friends, but you can have few quality friends that help you fulfill the purpose of your creation (i.e. live for Allah).

 8.  When you're happy, try to share your happiness with others. Thank Allah for that, and pray its continuation.

 9.  When something bad or embarrassing happens to you, just think that it could always be worse, remember the reward of patience,and thank Allah that it's not worse than it is.

 10. Do something extra of goodness once in a while, like feeding a poor person, or caressing an orphan's head.

 11. Never stop believing that you can win Allah's love and thus work For it. Then you can win the love of Allah's slaves.

 12. Spend some time thinking of Allah's amazing creation.

 13. Always love those who love Allah unconditionally. This way you will ensure that you live for Him, love for Him, and hate for Him(those who are enemies of Him).

 14. Find the righteous ways to express yourself, and if you think that what you are about to say shall cause no benefit, maintain silence (this is tough!!).

 15. Every now and then, give yourself a break. Play sports, give time to your family, friends, but always remember Allah and watch that He is watching you.

 16. Pray for blessing to come to those being lost, and pray to Allah to guide them to the right path.

 17. Hug your parents, kiss their hands and heads and always obey but stop at Allah's orders.

 18. Smile to everyone, for your smile makes a big difference to him or her and you are rewarded.

 19. Forgive, forget and smile.

 20. Tears are not for women only... tears are for all human beings with feelings remaining in them. Don't restrain your tears when remembering Allah.

 21. When people criticize your actions and effort, revise your actions and see if they please Allah or no. If they do; then ignore and remember how the Prophet (SAAW) and the Sahaba were criticized, made fun of and even physically harmed, so have patience.

 22. Read the Quran daily and try to have a schedule for completing it as much as you could. As you open the Quran daily, read with observing not just passing your eyes through the words.

 23. Don't let popularity go to your head, for it never lasts and you may lose from it more than gain.

 24. Never look down on anybody, for, to Allah, they may be better than you.

 25. Send this to all brothers with the intention of having a healthy society living for Allah and pray.

Hijrah Kerja

Assalamualaikum =)

after 4 weeks on medical leave... i started my work already.. dah seminggu diam tak diam...
i dont know why.. my body clock seems dah tak boleh adjust to London time.. London time? ohh saya keje time london..hihik.. since now winter i work from 4pm to 1am...

i feel so tired... penat sangat...maybe i will be ok next week or i have no mood to work there...

no mood? yup.. we short of staff and kerja banyak.. arghh.. they just dont bother kan.. as long as business is on track.. omai... we just need to be positive.. yes i am... i have been patient since last 3 months..

while i was on 4 weeks medical leave.. i noticed ... this is not what i want...especially when i start my hijrah.. dulu aku giler kerja.. nak gaji besar besar...tapi sekarang it doesnt matter any more.. buat apa gaji besar if kita jauh dari Allah?

i want to work at normal hour.. so that i can go to any kuliah agama or usrah at night... i want to work yang will give me benefit in dunia and akhirat.. maybe i need to move to Islamic banking line.. oh my current working environment is very challenging to my Iman.. working in an international bank is hard. Eventhough i got good salary.. i dont think money is everything... another choice i have is just walk out from banking/finance line... enough say...

its about time to 'hijrah' in my work life

now, im waiting for January to come, cari kerja lain... and move on...

Beriktiar and i put all hope in Allah.. He knows the best...

Susah di sini atau susah di sana? You choose.

Hidup ini indah jika dipandukan Al - Quran & sunnah. Namun tidak semua orang nampak semua itu. Yang dorang nampak keseronokan di dunia. Come on dunia ni sementara, akhirat itu abadi, selamanya.. tak ke chill2 dgn nabi, para ulama kat sorga? Kenapa nak kejar dunia yang sementara....Mari menjadi hamba nya.. sorga cita cita kita... mungkin susah mungkin payah.. tapi kalau kita buat kerana niat Lillahita'ala Insya Allah, semua nya mudah.
Jalan-jalan meraih Syurga Allah tidak dipagari keindahan, kemewahan dan kemudahan, banyak rintangan dan halangan, pelbagai ujian menanti, semoga Allah memberikan kekuatan kepada kita semua untuk bermujahadah......

Semoga kita terus istiqamah mencari keredhaan Ilahi...

AdaMU

16November 2012, hari jumaat pertama tahun baru 1434H. Hari yg penting buat semua umat Islam termasuk aku. Hari ni aku akan dibedah. Yes, dibedah. I was detected having cyst ovary. I have a large cyst ovary and chances to loose my left ovary is very high.sapa x sedih. Of coz sedih but I believe Allah hv better plan for me, all good things from HIM, silap adalah dr kita sendiri. Aku redha kerana semua ini milik Allah.ini pinjaman dia sementara kat kita.I still feel lucky despite having this large cyst  ovary, u know y. Sbb aku tahu Allah sayangkan aku, dia ingat kat aku sbb tu dia bg dugaan ini. After try many methods to get this cyst disappear, tp tak hilang2 jd aku buat keputusan utk remove it through operation. Itu pilihan terakhir aku. 16 nov 2012, 4 days after I celebrate my 31yrs old birthday :) Tiba lah 16nov, hari yg ditunggu2. Haha. Aku admit kul 7 pagi, kat Pantai medical bangsar. Settled check in, nurse amik BP, BP tinggi! Gulp. Nervous!of coz nervous kan. Aku pon relax2,depa start bg ubat buang2 air. Ha bermula laa pengeluaran besar2..hehe. Aku duduk relax sambil ditemani ibuayah, masuk lg nurse. Nah baju operation and cap. Gulp! Dah nak time. Tgk jam kul 1230. Bismillah. Aku tunggu zohor, sempat tgk Dr muhaya kat alhidayah TV3..aku siap.pakai baju operation baring..sbb operation kul 2.

Aku tenang. Tak lekang zikirullah  dibibir ku.depa nak amik kul 130..tunggu punya tunggu x mai. Lupa kat aku ke? Wah excited pulak nak g operate! Haha. Smp 230, masuk nurse she checked all details bla2..ok nak bawak dah ni. Aku pon salam my family, tetibe I burst into tears!!! Aku sedih tgk muka ibu sedih risau, all the while hanya pd Allah aku menanges. Aku x leh kontrol. Tipu sapa x takut kan. Ibu peluk sambil berbisik' jgn sedih, dugaan dr Allah kerana Dia syg kita, dia ingat kita. Yakin pd Allah,selawat,Istifar banyak banyak'.

Maka keluar la aku dr bilik. Diusung atas katil oleh 2 nurse. Aku takda apa2 hanya terbaring, pakai sehelai baju biru operation dgan cap. Tu saje. Terdetik kalau ini kali terakhir aku membuka mata ku. Aku x sanggup. Banyak dosa lg..banyak lg ibadah kpd Allah ingin ku lakukan. Bagi aku peluang Ya Rab. Air mata ku masih meleleh. Sampai nurse tegur,sabar kak, jgn risau semua ok. Jgn takut. Hmm. Aku terus berselawat, zikir.

Doa lailahailaantasubhanainikuntummizalimin x lekang dr mulut aku.sampai dpn bilik OT. Kat luar ade 3 katil nak masuk.. Hmmm terdetik dihati ade org lg teruk dari aku, jdlah hamba yg bersyukur.Redha. Katakan Alhamdulilah walaupun kita diduga oleh Nya. Aku kembali tenang, ku yakin ada Mu Allah bersama.

Masuk OT, depa pindahkan aku kat katil OT dan tolak aku ke satu sudut tunggu Dr idora. Dr idora ade kes. Belum habis, oh no wonder la lambat depa amik aku. Aku terus berzikir,bselawat, aku yakin Allah&Rasullulah saw mendengar permintaan ku. Teringat kata2 Dr MAZA, berdoa lah sepenuh hati seperti Allah sedang mendengar rintihan hati kita. Zikirullah terus.

Tak lama pastu dtg Dr Anita Gonzales, she is my anaesthesiologist. She asked 'r u ready for operation?' Yes doctor. With full confident. Haha. Pastu dia suh nurse antar aku p OT3.. OTW to OT room aku sempat berangan cam dlm Greys anatomy..hehe..Ok tukar katil, naik meja operation.jeng2. Hanya sekujur tubuh terbaring lemah melihat lampu2 di atas ku.Dr anita dah start cari urat tgnku, nurse sebok bukak baju aku nak letak all wires on my chest. I'm helpless.

Aku yg selama ini seorg yg tegas, Independent, strong tetapi sekarang I feel I'm just small tiny kudus, insan lemah. Aku pasrah, tawakal dgn bekalan doa kpd Allah. Aku yakin. Aku tenang.  Aku terus berzikir lg, aku tahu Allah mendengar dan bersama ku sentiasa.

Dr Idora sampai. 'Hi dear!!, Lets get it done'..hehehe.... Di bisik di telinga ku, 'don't worry, isthifar, selawat, shahadah banyak2, In shaa Allah  everything will be ok. Now u can sleep.Aku senyum, alhamdulilah aku dpt seorg doctor professional mukminah. Dr anita said, I will jap u with bius. Aku angguk, kemudian they put the oksigen mask. Aku masih terus berzikir. Shahadah, kalimah terakhir sebelum aku  ditidokan 'deep sleep'.zzzzzz.

Eh aku nak tweet Ustaz Azhar idrus jap! Huh!!  aku terbukak biji mata. Ha? UAI? Aku mamai. Mata berat nak bukak. Oksigen mask masih dimulutku. Aku gagah cuba bukak mata, pusing kiri kanan tp x daya. Di mana aku? Tetibe ada suatu suara berbisik. 'Everything went well'. Aku hanya nampak bayang2 and I notice that voice,Dr idora. Ya Allah kuatkan aku utk bukak mata ku. Tetiba aku teringat ibu ckp' along nanti kat recovery room after the operation, time nak sedar sebut Ya Allah YA allah, selawat banyak2. Aku buat aku cuba lawan ubat bius. Saat aku bukak mata, nurse dtg, cabut mask aku, ckp dah call bilik awak, nanti dorg amik awk bawak naik. Alhamdulilah. Aku msih separah sedar namun sempat tanya, Dr idora dtg ke td. Nurse kata ya. Betullah. Pastu aku tanye nApe tekak sy sakit, oh dorg buat tunnel to help my breathing in the op. Oh ok.

Aku pon berehat sementara tunggu nurse aku dtg bawak masuk bilik. Tgk jam di dinding kul 8.. Wah lama. Aku msuk oT 340. Nurse ckp aku keluar kul 6.aku sedar kul 730.. I really in deep sleep.hehe.naik atas my family dah tunggu dlm bilik. Rasa sakit tetap sakit.. Tapi I manage to handle it. Tak makan pon pain killer nurse bagi, but still they put ubat bontot for pain killer pasrah. Then I realize they put urine tube on me. Sedih, bertapa aku bersyukur nikmat kesihatan yg Allah bg kpd ku selama ini.

Hari kedua, they start to take off my drip, my urine tube. I can eat even a bit delusion. I can walk, I see my flat stomach.hehe.Alhamdulilah.

Dr Anita came by and checked on my pain after surgery.Aku tunggu my favorite gynie,  Dr Idora. Dia dtg. I want to know how's my left ovary. Dia tunjukkan video operation. Ya allah, scary. My cyst was full with 2.5 liter fluid! And got 2 small cyst inside the big cyst. MasyaAllah tp kuasa Allah azza wajallah, aku x pernah sekali ade rasa sakit. My period cycle ok and no period pain at all. SubhanaAllah. Semua dengan izin Allah.

Finally Dr idora shows me my left ovary! This is miracle, amazing! SubhanaAllah, MasyaAllah. 'Eventhough u have big cyst, Ur ovary still looks fine'. Takde kata yg dpt aku gambarkan. Mata ku bergenang mensyukuri nikmat Allah. Ya Rab, dgn izin Mu semua ini berlaku. Aku sebak, sedih mengingat kembali dosa2 zaman jahil aku tapi aku ingkar, lupa pada Nya, tapi Allah tetap memberi nikmat kepada ku. Ya Rahman Ya Rahim. Semua ini berlaku dgn izin Allah.

Allah azza wajallah.

Sesungguhnya dosa kami terlalu banyak Ya Allah namun rahmat dan maghfirah-Mu mengatasi kemurkaan-Mu. Ampuni kami Ya Rabb yang Maha Agung...Berdoa lah selagi kita mampu. Doa itu senjata kita. Sesungguh nya Allah maha mendengar lg mengetahui. Dia menurunkan dugaan tak lebih drp kemampuan kita. bersangka baik lah selalu dgn Allah. He is the best planner. Jalanlah di atas muka bumi Allah ini untuk mencari keredhaan Nya, cita2 kita untuk menuju ke SyurgaNya. Sedarlah wahai manusia2, dunia ini hanya sementara.

Kurniakan la kami kesihatan yg baik supaya kami dpt melaksanakan ibadah kepada Mu Ya Allah. Amin Yarabbaalamin.

P/S : thanks to all Pantai Medical centre KL nurses yg sangat baik melayan saya, they have provided an excellence and quality service!
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